Competitive Smash Players Must Now Register Into A Database, Notify Neighbors

Competitive Smash players now cannot legally be within 500 feet of schools, and must notify neighbors, thanks to a new law passed after the latest grooming scandal.

The new law requires that all competitive Smash players be registered into a database. They will be barred from all eSports events, and have their Switch consoles' online capabilities disabled to prevent them from communicating with any underage players or maining Inkling or Belmonts.

These new restrictions come on the heel of the massive grooming scandal that's been sweeping though the Smash eSports community, not actually just because the average Smash player's stench could be picked up from 500 feet away. But the children will be relieved to be safe from that regardless.

Nintendo has yet to make any official comments about the law, but have publicly denounced all predatory behavior within their community, and have severed all relations with eSports players they'd previously collaborated with.