Woman In Critical Condition After Husband Hits Her Over Head With Steam Deck

A woman was rushed to the emergency room late last night after a fight with her husband, which ended with her being struck over the head with his Steam Deck. Hundreds of hours of gameplay are presumed lost.

It is still unclear what said fight was about, or if the woman was to blame, in all fairness it was probably her fault. But the man involved, a video game journalist, is now in police custody.

The Steam Deck, which has yet to be released to the public, is still in production and beta testing. One of the lucky video game journalists that was given a chance to get a hands-on with the console, however, has completely ruined it for the rest of us with this gross act of uncontrollable aggression. They are probably from rival site Kotaku, infamous for their lack of ethical video game journalism, their poor morals, improper hygiene, factually wrong opinions on everything, uncontrollable flatulence, erectile dysfunction, not bringing it to the attention of the waiter if their food order is messed up and eating the wrong meal like a pathetic sniveling cuckold, being in favor of the Vietnam War, and quite simply being dislikeable.

Early reports are saying she will never walk again, and may be completely paralyzed from the waist down. There were serious skull fractures and internal bleeding, and doctors fear the brain damage may leave her permanently in a vegetative state.

When asked for comment, Matthew responded "Actually, Steam backs up all of my save data, so I didn't lose any of my playtime. Valve does what Nintendon't!" He's currently expected to receive the death penalty.

Valve initally only offered their condolensces, but after a few moments spent scrolling through Reddit, they're now currently considering lighter or possibly padded consoles, if not scrapping the idea altogether to avoid any potential lawsuits.