wholesome BRAVE: Lockheed Martin Announce "Nuclear Pride Missiles" That Release Rainbow Mushroom Cloud Pride Month is already off to an impressive start. Corporations and celebrities, the most important people and groups in the world, are standing up and supporting the rights of LGBT
overwatch Overwatch 2 To Get New White Supremacist Hero To Further Diversify Cast (He's Also Latino) Overwatch 2 is going to be a thing. Many fans were shocked, considering Overwatch the original is barely a thing anymore, not counting the massive online community that has been
world war iii Duolingo Introduces "Duolingo For War" With international tensions rising and the threat of war looming overhead, many have felt a little uneasy. Your comfortable way of life may be threatened by forces out of your
i need to piss USDA Adds Microplastics To Top Of Food Pyramid The USDA has just released their updated model of the food pyramid, and there's a shocking new addition that has many experts scratching their heads. At the very top of
music Popular Rock Band 100 Gecs Down To 87.6 Gecs Due To Inflation The world economy has been hurting as of late, first with the pandemic lock-downs and now with the Russia-Ukraine conflict. And many Americans have started to feel it at the
trolling BREAKING: People Still Not Listening To "Schizo Man" That Prophecized The Great War Coming War, famine, and plague have engulfed the world. The future is uncertain, resources are becoming scarce, doom seems to be looming overhead. And still, no one is listening to the
piss world Russia-Ukraine Conflict Actually Just Elaborate Call Of Duty Viral Marketing Stunt Just as it seemed we were on the brink of world war and all of our lives were about to be drastically changed for the worse for the profit of
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world war iii Ukraine Deploys Freddy Fazbear On Invading Russian Forces Tensions between Ukraine and Russia have escalated into a full-scale invasion, and Ukraine is not backing down without a fight. The world may very well be on the brink of
world war iii President Biden Escalates Tensions With Russia After Being Unmatched On Tinder Thousands of troops were moved to Ukraine's border over the past week, and even more are expected to be sent shortly, after a disappointing day of swiping through Tinder for
tragic Undertale Pacifist Run Ruined As 8 Child Laborers Die In Cobalt Mining Incident A rather promising Undertale speed run was ruined last night when news broke of a mining incident that killed eight child laborors and left at least a dozen more injured.
facebook US Senator Calls For Social Media Sites To End "Schizoposting" Senators had a rare chance to grill Facebook's global head of safety, a corporation infamous for conducting strange secret psychological experiments on its users and mass-collecting their information. Unfortunately, for
antisemitism Tetris To Remove "S" Block Over Claims Of Anti-Semitism Anti-Semitism and racism have always been rampant problems in the gamer sphere. If it's not some popular "YouTube streamer" spouting slurs or angry hate mobs calling for the white-washing of
we live in a society Chick-Fil-A Forced To Hire Black Employee Amid Labor Shortage Tough times have fallen on the American people. The economy has been devastated, political unrest is all over the news, and Walmart is no longer open 24 hours. It's like
we live in a society Shark Tale 2 Cancelled After Negative Reception To Scene Of Fish Being Shot 16 Times By Police Once again, the liberal left has taken something away from every good, red-blooded American. You can't live your life in this dystopian society anymore without those accursed libtards ruining everything.
pornhub Activision Blizzard To DMCA Takedown All Overwatch Porn In Wake Of Harassment Lawsuit Activision Blizzard's PR has been having a rough time trying to smooth over all of the damage that has been caused by their big sexual harassment lawsuit. Nothing they say
god help us FDA Refuses To Approve Soulja Boy "Soulja Shot" Medicinal Injection Our prayers have finally been answered. The unending nightmare that's gripped our crumbling world, sending the sheep into a panicking frenzy, it's finally over. At least that's what Soulja Boy
we live in a society Derek Chauvin Accepts Plea Bargain Of Appearing On BLACKED America has emerged victorious from the era of Trump's hate and bigotry. Bills are being passed, people are being vaccinated, the immigrant children in cages are now being held in
piss world New Bill Makes Unskippable Google Ads Mandatory Before Every Mandatory Fact Check A controversial new bill was just passed by the Senate, making the unskippable Google ads before a mandatory fact check on any particular article or meme completely mandatory. The mandatory
trolling United Nations Deploys Anti-Trolling Task Force Following an unprecedented and completely out of the blue surge in "trolling" across the globe, the United Nations has been called upon by every country in the world to help
girl power New Female Fully Autonomous Military Drones Will Be Thick As Fuck, Vaporize Minorities On Sight History is being made today as the US military welcomes the world's first fully autonomous female drones into its ranks. The "The Future is Female" future has arrived today in
piss world Joe Biden Declares Marvel Cinematic Universe To Be New National Religion Move over "Jesus", there is a new savior in town, several of them to be exact. Iron Man, Captain America, Thor, and more are now America's patron gods. The choice
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4 inches is average Donald Trump Sentenced To Life In Chastity Cage Donald Trump will never cum again. After four years, the tyrannical, Orwellian nightmare of Trump's America has finally come to a satisfying conclusion. Congress delivered the lifetime sentence to Trump