epstein Unsealed Documents Expose Bill Clinton As Avid My Hero Academia Fan Rumors and conspiracy theories have followed the Clintons for years, from rigging the 2016 election to Epstein and beyond. But newly unsealed documents from the Ghislaine Maxwell case have revealed
the end times Kanye Forges Pact With Merkabah, Throne Chariot of God, To Cleanse America Of Sin One of the most powerful humans on Earth and presidential hopeful Kanye West has just ascended to an even higher plane of being. Throne Chariot of God and Archangel Merkabah
breaking news Ghislaine Maxwell: "The 1% Get High And Play Kirby Air Ride All Day" The world has been waiting with baited breath for the trial of Ghislaine Maxwell, if it'll ever come. Some fear she won't survive long enough to testify. The long-time accomplice
deus vult Kanye: "We Will Retake Jerusalem" America will be ushering in a new age of crusaders, according to presidential hopeful Kanye West. The rapper, now poised to turn America's democracy into a theocracy, insists that our
poopoo peepee Kanye West Poops His Pants At White House Briefing Controversial rapper Kanye West surprised the nation when he announced he'd be running for president in 2020. No one was sure whether to take him seriously or not, but he
china Trump Calls To Remove "Chinese Fighter" From Smash Amid Rising COVID Tensions President Trump had a lot to say this morning about the newest addition to the Super Smash Bros roster, ARMS representative Min Min. While there were many hoping for a
north korea Kim Jong-un: "Port Mario Party 2 To PS5 Or I Launch Nukes" Tensions with North Korea are escalating once again. Kim Jong-un has issued an unwavering demand. Mario Party 2 on PS5, or else. Trump officials met with Kim Jong-un to negotiate,
wholesome World Officials Call For Beach Episode Amid International Riots And Pandemics The UN has called for an international beach episode in response to the nonstop slew of war, strife, famine, and plague. The world needs some ass and titties now more
world news Protestors Urged To Insert Disc 2 As D.C. Is Engulfed In Flames Rioting nationwide has raged out of control, President Donald Trump has gone into hiding within a bunker, and the nation must now insert the second disc into the PlayStation console
wholesome Rioting Nationwide Abruptly Ends As Someone Cracks Open An Ice-Cold Pepsi An anonymous protestor has single-handedly ended the nationwide riots early this morning, when they cracked open a cool, refreshing Pepsi. As soon as the crisp sound of the can opening
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joe biden Joe Biden Declares That He Will Be America's First Black President Former vice president Joe Biden has officially announced today that he will be the first black president of the United States. With tensions escalating as the election draws near, Biden
joe biden Joe Biden Appoints Sasuke Uchiha To Be New Vessel For His Soul, Vows To Use Power Of The Sharingan To Defeat Trump The race for the presidency has begun heating up. Hidden Leaf Village senator Bernie Sanders has fallen in battle, opening up the path to the nomination for Joe Biden. While
bernie sanders BREAKING: Bernie Sanders Suspends Campaign To Go Take A Piss It’s official. Bernie Sanders has dropped out of the 2020 race for president, and has cleared the way for Biden to take the nomination. The Vermont senator announced
piss world Can We Pretend Like Airplanes In The Night Sky Are Like Shooting Stars? Are you prepared, Son of Man? The great crossroads of fate is upon us. He has once again sent an Ordeal, a baptism of fire, to test the righteous and
bernie sanders Bloomberg To Buttigieg: "You're Alright, Don't Come To The Next Debate" Democratic nominee hopeful Michael Bloomberg sent a rather ominous message just last night to another candidate running for President. After the last debate, which saw Michael Bloomberg get relentlessly torn
baby nut BREAKING: Senate Votes For Baby Nut To Die By Firing Squad Execution A verdict was finally reached in the trial of convicted war criminal Baby Nut. The Senate has voted overwhelmingly in favor of an old-fashioned firing squad execution, which is currently
anime BREAKING: United States Declares Public Health Emergency Over Outbreak Of Sword Art Online Fans United States officials have declared Sword Art Online fans to be a public health emergency today, as cases of the severe mental illness have climbed into the hundreds of thousands.
baby yoda BREAKING: Fire Emblem Character Qualifies For Next Democratic Debate Over Bernie Sanders Everyone watching the Democratic debates on February 7th will definitely be feeling the burn, not because of Bernie Sanders, but because a different candidate has just qualified from the Fire
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breaking news BREAKING: Trump Deploys Annoying Orange To Iran, Violating Geneva Convention And Committing Several War Crimes World War III is now raging across the globe. There is no hope left for negotiations or peace talks. Iran is now amassing nuclear weapons, and America has made a
News Prince Philip On Loose After Release From Hospital, First Bite Victim Comes Forward Britain’s Prince Philip was released from the hospital in time for the holidays, and was allowed to spend time with the rest of the royal family for Christmas.
cum Nancy Pelosi Will Pop Her Pussy On Senate Floor To Impeach Trump Donald Trump’s impeachment has been all over the news lately. The Democrats have finally moved to impeach, and the House has ruled in favor of impeachment. There’
donald trump Just Because The House Voted To Impeach Trump, Doesn't Mean The Senate Has Found A Peach Big Enough To Put Him In, Says Trump Advisor Ever since the 2016 election, the Democrats have been pushing to get Trump impeached from office. And here we are, about to enter 2020, and they’ve finally done
cum Mike Pence Is Not Allowed To Cum After over a month of quiet simmering behind closed doors, Trump’s impeachment inquiries have burst out into the public, along with all of the details they’ve
