Tough times have fallen on the American people. The economy has been devastated, political unrest is all over the news, and Walmart is no longer open 24 hours. It's like we live in some third world country now. But we've sunk to a new low, as a nation. Chick-fil-A has hired a black employee.

Customers were shocked. It seems you aren't safe anywhere anymore. Not even in Chick-fil-A.

"I don't know if I can eat here anymore. I've started carrying pepper spray with me just in case. Are they really gonna let them behind the counter like that? What if they... you know..." One loyal Chick-fil-A customer said, clutching her purse tightly and leering over her shoulder.

"We really have no choice. We've fallen on hard times, and need staff to operate. We've taken precautions to make sure our customers and other employees are safe, like having a manager count the money in the register at close and offering the local police free food to make sure we have good relationships with them. You know, keep an eye on the place for us, in case we start getting more... you know. We think our customers will learn to live with this. It's only temporary, we'll be able to hire more regular employees soon."

Customers are not so sure about this new change. Some have expressed great discomfort eating at the establishment, and others have said they'll never come back to this particular location. "The food, there's something wrong with the food. I just know he's the one that made it. It tastes... different. Like... more. I can taste more, I don't know how to explain it. It was like a... a party in my mouth. And it scared me. I had to run to the bathroom to throw up. I'll never eat their chicken again."

America's crippled work force has sent ripples through the nation, and there's no telling when these danged liberals will man up and get a job already. The economy is suffering, and they're now putting families in danger by forcing businesses to start hiring blacks. It's absolutely sickening, how selfish they are. It's like they don't even care that our country is falling apart.

As of last night, the black worker is still employed by Chick-Fil-A, and even after counting the register twice at the end of the shift, it seems they will continue to be employed for at least one more day. But they are "on thin ice" for no particular reason, according to the manager.

At this rate, it's only going to be a matter of time until the perp is apprehended. Stay tuned for updates.