heartwarming REPORT: Archangel Michael Confirms Ross From Friends Will Be Eternally Damned Many will be relieved to hear that Ross from Friends is going to be damned for all eternity. This is truly a glorious day for everyone. All of mankind. All
wholesome Andrew Tate Comes Out As Transgender "I've been running from it all my life, and I'm sorry it took this long for me to admit it. But I won't
heartwarming Andrew Tate Admits He's A Virgin, Made The Whole Thing Up To Sound Cool "It all started with one little lie. And then it got bigger, and bigger, and I had to keep telling more lies just to keep up the first lie.
wholesome BRAVE: Lockheed Martin Announce "Nuclear Pride Missiles" That Release Rainbow Mushroom Cloud Pride Month is already off to an impressive start. Corporations and celebrities, the most important people and groups in the world, are standing up and supporting the rights of LGBT
wholesome chungus 100 WHOLESOME: Prince Philip, 99, Is Still Dead Prince Philip, husband to Queen Elizabeth II, is still dead. Buckingham Palace had announced that Philip had died back on April 9th, 2021. The cause seemed to be of old
jihad In Response To Sony And Microsoft Acquisitions, Nintendo Purchases Land, Guns, Bulk Ammo Sony and Microsoft have been on a buying spree lately, acquiring studios and IP left and right. Some of the biggest names in gaming, like Activision Blizzard and Bethesda, have
wholesome New LEGO Star Wars Game Allows You To Kick Baby Yoda Across A Football Field Big news for gamers and Star Wars fans, your wildest Star Wars dreams can finally be realized. That's right. No, not fucking the blue alien girls. No, your
wholesome chungus 100 Nintendo Announces Way For Fans To Re-Experience Classics For The First Time Nostalgia has long been a cornerstone of Nintendo's marketing strategy. Familiar faces like Mario and Pikachu keep people coming back to their consoles, and it's been
yiff Leaked Pokémon Legends: Arceus Screens Reveal Ability To Marry Your Pokémon Early copies of Pokémon Legends: Arceus have gotten out, and the leaks have already begun. All of the new Pokémon, new forms, evolutions, and more have been making the rounds,
wholesome chungus 100 Scientists Discover Cure For Fictional Scenarios In Your Head That Make You Feel Sad It's a problem we've all had at different times in our lives. Laying awake in bed, they're not texting you back, it's
antisemitism Tetris To Remove "S" Block Over Claims Of Anti-Semitism Anti-Semitism and racism have always been rampant problems in the gamer sphere. If it's not some popular "YouTube streamer" spouting slurs or angry hate mobs calling
piss world New Bill Makes Unskippable Google Ads Mandatory Before Every Mandatory Fact Check A controversial new bill was just passed by the Senate, making the unskippable Google ads before a mandatory fact check on any particular article or meme completely mandatory. The mandatory
wholesome chungus 100 Elon Musk Invents Brain Chip To Play Among Us In Real Life It's a brave new world we live in, computers can now do so much. And they can now do even more than your brain can. It's
piss world Joe Biden Declares Marvel Cinematic Universe To Be New National Religion Move over "Jesus", there is a new savior in town, several of them to be exact. Iron Man, Captain America, Thor, and more are now America's
wholesome WHOLESOME: President Biden Throws Out Trump's Cum Sock In an absolutely triumphant display of dominance, Joe Biden has made a symbolic gesture of the end of white supremacy in America by throwing out the White House Cum Sock,
wholesome Trump Supporters Start GoFundMe For Israel Foreign Aid Budget In Protest Of Biden Win Joe Biden has been the projected winner of the presidential election, and the media has completely snubbed Trump and his supporters despite how loudly they've voiced their discontent.
playstation New "SonyFans" Program Will Allow PS5 Users To Pay To Watch People Play Better Games The hype for the next generation of consoles has been ramping up. PS5 and Xbox Series X are on their way, and both console makers have been making preparations for
furries Trump Adds Fur Affinity To Growing List Of Banned Social Media Platforms The war against TikTok and WeChat was only the beginning for President Trump, as he's now taken to banning even more problematic social networking sites from operating. Popular
coronavirus BREAKING: Dr. Mario Finds Red-Yellow Pill Cures COVID-19 The fight against COVID-19 is finally over, as leading expert Doctor Mario Mario has discovered the exact formula for the vaccine. A pill that is one half red, one half
fuck jimmy kimmel BLM Tear Down Jimmy Kimmel Statues Not Because He Did Blackface But Just Because He's Not Funny Black Lives Matter protestors have begun tearing down statues of unfunny talentless shill Jimmy Kimmel, completely unrelated to the blackface photos that surfaced recently. Yes, Jimmy Kimmel did blackface long
pride month Nickelodeon Confirms Spongebob Is A MAP There was some confusion when Nickelodeon tweeted out that Spongebob was LGBTQ. Many took it as confirmation that he was gay. But as it turns out, he's a
pride month Sony Confirms PS5 Is Gay And Sucks Hella Dick It's a big day for the LGBT community today, as Sony has confirmed that the PlayStation 5 is going to be gay and suck mega cock. The next
sissy hypno Elmer Fudd To Be Feminized Sissy Femboy In New Looney Tunes Reboot Warner Brothers has officially decided no more guns for the iconic hunter Elmer Fudd. Instead, the bumbling Bugs Bunny villain will be given estrogen supplements in his quest to capture
wholesome World Officials Call For Beach Episode Amid International Riots And Pandemics The UN has called for an international beach episode in response to the nonstop slew of war, strife, famine, and plague. The world needs some ass and titties now more
world news Protestors Urged To Insert Disc 2 As D.C. Is Engulfed In Flames Rioting nationwide has raged out of control, President Donald Trump has gone into hiding within a bunker, and the nation must now insert the second disc into the PlayStation console